One Year Later

Today is “Bell Let’s Talk” day, which is an initiative aimed to end the stigma attached to mental illness and give people the confidence to speak openly about their troubles without fear of judgement. I think it’s a great idea because there is no shame in suffering. However, talking is only the beginning. Making mental illness something “normal” won’t solve the problem.

Let me be clear: Struggling is not abnormal. In fact, mental illness is no respecter of persons. It doesn’t make you weak, or lesser than someone else, or weird. But the illness in of itself is not something to embrace nor claim. The first step is to admit yes I struggle, yes I have this problem. The next step is to give it over to God.

Last year on this day, I revealed publically my own personal struggle with depression and anxiety. [Read it here]. For many years I believed it was my lot in life, that it was to be managed, not cured. Perhaps I didn’t fully believe I could be healed. Perhaps I didn’t know myself without this issue.

Admitting a weakness has now become something of a trend. It often garner’s sympathy, and understanding. If it results in bullying, there is a band of social justice warriors ready to fight on your behalf. Is the initiative there to solve the problem, or is it simply to raise awareness and help people feel safe while they battle?

Again, the idea is a great one. However, it’s not grounded in the word of God and thus flawed at its core. It’s important to talk and be open and be honest. But what happens next?

I can’t encourage someone to admit they have a mental illness and then leave them with no solution to actually fix it. It’s not a permanent condition. It’s not a fact about you that’s written on your Twitter bio. It took me a while to realise that.

In the year since my public admission, a lot has changed. And that is the complete disappearance of any semblance of depression. I no longer wake up feeling hopeless or helpless. I no longer go to bed feeling dread about what’s to come. I no longer sit and stare out the window, contemplating the point of my existence.

The circumstances around me haven’t changed. If anything, life gets more challenging as the days wear on. The difference isn’t in my situation. If external circumstances were the source of our joy and happiness, we would be ecstatic one day, and miserable the next. No, the cure to my mental health issue was the only unchanging force in the universe.

I’ve heard many people say that God healed them, and to be honest, I used to be skeptical. Maybe that’s why I held my struggle close to my chest, rather than releasing it. Maybe I was afraid that even after prayer, I would remain unchanged, and then what would I do? If my last hope didn’t work, what would happen?

And that was the problem. The little bit of doubt that an all-powerful God might not be able to help me caused me to remain stuck where I was. Despite the promises that God was my healer, I still chose to fight on my own. The acknowledgement was the first step for me because God can’t heal what we hide.

Once I got over the lie that Christians can’t be depressed, I was able to live with it, but I wasn’t dealing with it. Because of the demonic forces in this world, depression can hit those in Christ. However, the key is that we have the ultimate deliverer on our side. Life isn’t always easy. Jesus never promised us that. But never did he say we are meant to live in torment or torture. Our God is bigger and greater and stronger than the wiles of the enemy. [Ephesians 6:11]

It’s not an antiquated notion. It’s not lip service to try and make you feel better. I know, and I am assured that there is complete freedom in Jesus Christ. Let’s talk about the real answer. Jesus, with the strength of the Holy Spirit, can bring us through everything. We have to make the choice to truly submit it to him or not.

Depression is not from God. It may hit for a fleeting moment, but it does not have any home or dwelling in a vessel given over to Christ Jesus. Don’t let it linger. We can go beyond having a conversation and we can give the solution. There is complete joy and peace in God alone. I am living proof. And I pray that your story will have the same ending.

If you are struggling and stuck in the pit of depression and anxiety and you need someone to stand by you in prayer, please contact me. You’re never alone. 

Verse of encouragement:

Psalm 34:17. Psalm 40:1-3. 1 Peter 5:7. John 16:33. 2 Corinthians 1:4. Isaiah 41:10.

You may also like...